Saturday, May 7, 2011

8 Stupid Mistakes Smart People Make


      8 Stupid Mistakes Smart People Make

I bet you know quite a few capable people who are staggeringly unproductive.  They work long hours, stress themselves out and never seem to make any significant progress, right?

Over the course of our lives we all develop unproductive habits that hinder us from gracefully achieving our critical goals.  And often, in the fast-paced world in which we live and work we don’t even notice that we’re making the same mistakes over and over again.  To live a balanced, beneficial life and engage in a long-term satisfying work, ridding ourselves of these oversights is imperative.

Here are eight mistakes smart people often make and how to avoid them:

1.  They confuse being busy with being productive.


In his book, The 4-Hour Workweek, Tim Ferris says, “Slow down and remember this: Most things make no difference.  Being busy is often a form of mental laziness – lazy thinking and indiscriminate action.”  This is Ferris’ way of saying “work smarter, not harder,” which happens to be one of the most prevalent modern day personal development clichés.  But like most clichés, few people actually adhere to it.

Just take a quick look around.  The busy outnumber the productive by a wide margin.

Busy people are rushing all over the place, and running late half of the time.  They’re heading to work, conferences, meetings, social engagements, etc.  They barely have enough free time for family get-togethers and they rarely get enough sleep.  Yet, business emails are shooting out of their smart phones like machine gun bullets and their daily planner is jammed to the brim with obligations.

Their busy schedule gives them an elevated sense of importance.  But it’s all an illusion.  They’re like hamsters running on a wheel.

The solution:  Slow down.  Breathe.  Review your commitments.  Put first things first.  Do one thing at a time.  Start now.  Take a short break in two hours.  Repeat.

2.  They spend time pursuing bogus achievements.


Personal growth is healthy.  Personal growth is an achievement.  So long as it’s real.  The problem is the pressure to grow brings with it the incentive to make growth easier.  Or more precisely, to make growth seem easier.

‘Growth games’ that promote bogus achievements are popping up online at an alarming rate.  Many of them are contained within products and services provided by popular brand names like Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.  They each contain a psychological underpinning that supports a growth game filled with bogus achievements – an accumulation of points that’s tied to the intended benefit of the core product or service.

With Facebook it’s friends.  With Twitter it’s followers.  With LinkedIn it’s connections.

Yes, each of them serves a legitimate purpose if used purposefully in moderation.  But most people get so carried away – obsessed – with the growth game’s point system that they completely forget about the legitimate reason they started using the product or service in the first place.

If you’re playing the game simply for entertainment’s sake, and you’re aware of it, great, more power to you.  But if you’re striving to achieve more and more friends, followers and connections for the sake of achieving them, your achievements are totally bogus.

This is why it’s imperative to get your mind right about what you’re doing and why you’re doing it.

The solution:   Simply ask yourself:  Is this activity making a positive, tangible difference in my life or anyone else’s life?  Is it a true prerequisite for a genuine goal?  Alternatively, am I absolutely okay with doing this just because I like doing it, laboring free of any delusion that it benefits me or anyone else?  The Success Principles is a great read on this topic.

3.  They learn how to do something and never do it.


Sadly, very few people ever live to become the success story they dream about.  And there’s one simple reason why:

They never take action!

The acquisition of knowledge doesn’t mean you’re growing.  Growing happens when what you know changes how you live.   Most people live in a complete daze.  Actually, they don’t LIVE.  They just ‘get by’ because they never take the necessary action to make things happen – to seek their dreams.

It doesn’t matter if you have a genius IQ and a PhD in Quantum Physics, you can’t change anything or make any sort of real-world progress without taking action.  There’s a huge difference between knowing how to do something and actually doing it.  Knowledge and intelligence are both useless without action.  It’s as simple as that.

The solution:  Success hinges on the simple act of making a decision to live – to absorb yourself in the process of going after your goals.  So make that decision.  And take action.  For some practical guidance on taking action I highly recommend The Now Habit.

4.  They use the wrong measurements to track their progress.


You can’t control what you don’t properly measure, and what you measure predicts your future.  If you track the wrong things you’ll be completely blind to potential opportunities as they appear over the horizon.

Imagine if, while running a small business, you made it a point to keep track of how many pencils and paperclips you used.  Would that make any sense?  No!  Because pencils and paperclips are not a measure of what’s important for a business.  Pencils and paperclips have no bearing on income, customer satisfaction, market growth, etc.

Let’s use blogging as a real world example.  Many wannabe probloggers (folks who aspire to blog for a living) actually view their blog’s RSS subscriber count as their number one measurement of success.  They track it meticulously and then freak out when Feedburner (a popular  RSS tracking service) experiences one of its frequent hiccups.  But what they fail to realize is that their RSS subscriber count is not a crucial measurement for their goal of becoming a problogger because most RSS subscribers have a very low level of engagement with the host site and its various revenue generators.  And generating revenue is a must for a problogger.

Once again, what you measure predicts your future.  You should be measuring the things that are directly tied to your primary goal.

The solution:  The proper approach is to figure out what your number one goal is and then track the things that directly relate to achieving that goal.  In my example above on problogging, that goal should be “making money from a blog.”  And a few things worth tracking would be click through ratios on ads, affiliate conversion rates, in-house product conversion rates, customer/reader feedback, etc.

I recommend that you take some time to identify your number one goal, identify the most important things for you to keep track of and then begin tracking immediately.  On a weekly basis, plug the numbers into a spreadsheet and use the data to create weekly or monthly trend graphs so you can visualize your progress.  Then fine-tune your actions to get those trends to grow in your favor.

5.  They become obsessed with making things perfect.


Many of us are perfectionists in our own right.  I know I am at times.  We set high bars for ourselves and put our best foot forward.  We dedicate copious amounts of time and attention to our work/passion to maintain our high personal standards.  Our passion for excellence drives us to run the extra mile, never stopping, never relenting.  And this dedication towards perfection undoubtedly helps us to achieve results.  So long as we don’t get carried away.

But what happens when we do get carried away with perfectionism?

We become disgruntled and discouraged when we fail to meet the (impossibly high) standards we set for ourselves, making us reluctant to take on new challenges or even finish tasks we’ve already started.  Our insistence on dotting every ‘I’ and crossing every ‘T’ breeds inefficiency, causing major delays, stress overload and subpar results.

True perfectionists have a hard time starting things and an even harder time finishing them… always.  I have a friend who has wanted to start a graphic design business for several years.  But she hasn’t yet.  Why?  When you sift through her extensive list of excuses it comes down to one simple problem.  She is a perfectionist.  Which means she doesn’t, and never will, think she’s good enough at graphic design to own and operate her own graphic design business.

The solution:  The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists.  It rewards people who get things done.  And the only way to get things done is to be imperfect 99% of the time.  Only by wading through years of practice and imperfection can we begin to achieve momentary glimpses of the perfection.  So make a decision.  Take action.  Learn from the outcome.  And repeat this method over and over and over again in all walks of life.  Also, check out Too Perfect.  It’s an excellent read on conquering perfectionism.

6.  They wait until they feel 100% ready before acting on an opportunity.


This point is somewhat related to the point above on perfectionism, but encompasses enough on its own to be discussed separately.

The number one thing I persistently see holding smart people back is their own reluctance to accept an opportunity simply because they don’t think they’re ready.  In other words, they believe they require additional knowledge, skill, experience, etc. before they can aptly partake in the opportunity.  Sadly, this is the kind of thinking that stifles personal growth.

The truth is nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises.  Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow emotionally and intellectually.  They force us to stretch ourselves and our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.  And when we don’t feel comfortable, we don’t feel ready.

The solution:  Remember that significant moments of opportunity for personal growth and development will come and go throughout your lifetime.  If you are looking to make positive changes in your life you will need to embrace these moments of opportunity even though you will never feel 100% ready for them.

7.  They inundate themselves with too many choices.


Here in the 21st century where information moves at the speed of light and opportunities for innovation seem endless, we have an abundant array of choices when it comes to designing our lives and careers.  But sadly, an abundance of choice often leads to indecision, confusion and inaction.

Several business and marketing studies have shown that the more product choices a consumer is faced with, the less products they typically buy.  After all, narrowing down the best product from a pool of three choices is certainly a lot easier than narrowing down the best product from a pool of three hundred choices.  If the purchasing decision is tough to make, most people will just give up.

Likewise, if you inundate yourself too many choices, your subconscious mind will give up.

The solution:  If you’re selling a product line, keep it simple.  And if you’re trying to make a decision about something in your life, don’t waste all your time evaluating every last detail of every possible option.  Choose something that you think will work and give it a shot.  If it doesn’t work out, choose something else and keep pressing forward.

8.  They lack balance in their life.


If you ask people to summarize what they want out of life they cough up a lot of words like ‘Love,’ ‘Money,’ ‘Success’, ‘Family’, ‘Recognition’, ‘Peace,’ ‘Happiness,’ etc.  But all of these things are totally different, and most people want all of them in their life.  Sadly, a vast majority of people don’t balance their life properly to achieve them.

I know an extremely savvy businesswoman who made almost a million dollars online last year. Every entrepreneur I know considers her to be wildly successful.  But guess what?  A few days ago, out of the blue, she told me that she’s depressed.  Why?  “I’m burnt out and lonely.  I just haven’t taken enough time for myself lately,” she said.  “Wow!” I thought.  “One of the most successful people I know isn’t happy.”

I also know a surfer who surfs almost all day, every day on the beach in front of our condo complex in San Diego.  He’s one of the most lighthearted, optimistic guys I’ve ever met – always smiling from ear to ear.  But he sleeps in a van he co-owns with another surfer and they both frequently panhandle tourists for money.  So while I can’t deny that this man seems happy, I wouldn’t classify his life as a success story.

These are just two simple examples of imbalanced lifestyles.  I could think of dozens of other examples like these just out of the small pool of people I know personally.

The solution:  When your work life (or social life, family life, etc.) is busy and all your energy is focused in that arena it’s all too easy to find yourself off balance.  While drive and focus is important, if you’re going to get things done right you still need to balance the various dimensions of your life.  Completely neglecting one dimension for another only leads to long-term frustration and stress.  For some practical guidance on balancing your life I recommend Zen And the Art of Happiness.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

12 Steps to Make a Dream a Reality

               

 

 

              12 Steps to Make a Dream a Reality

 

No fluff.  No frills.  No filler.
Here are 12 fundamental steps for turning the dreams and ideas in your mind into realities in your life.
We all have our own life to pursue,
our own kind of dream to be weaving.
And we all have some power to make wishes come true,
as long as we keep believing.
- Louisa May Alcott

Step #1 – Lose the negative attitude.  Think positively.

Negative thinking creates negative results.  Positive thinking creates positive results.  Period.
Every one of the other suggestions below are irrelevant if your mind is stuck in the gutter.  Positive thinking is at the forefront of every great success story.  The mind must believe it can do something before it is capable of actually doing it.  For some practical positive thinking guidance I recommend reading The Power of Positive Thinking.

Step #2 – Figure out what you really want out of life.

You’ll be running on a hamster wheel forever if you never decide where you want to go.  Figure out what’s meaningful to you so you can be who you were born to be.
Some of us were born to be musicians – to communicate intricate thoughts and rousing feelings with the strings of a guitar.  Some of us were born to be poets – to touch people’s hearts with exquisite prose.  Some of us were born to be entrepreneurs – to create growth and opportunity where others saw rubbish.  And still, some of us were born to be or do whatever it is, specifically, that moves you.
Don’t waste your life fulfilling someone else’s dreams and desires.  You must follow your intuition and make a decision.

Step #3 – Surround yourself with great people.

You are the sum of the people you spend the most time with.  If you hang with the wrong people, they will negatively affect you.  But if you hang with the right people, you will be far more capable and powerful than you ever could have been alone.  Find your tribe and work together to make a difference in all of your lives.  Tribes by Seth Godin is a great read on this topic.

Step #4 – Work on it for real.

The harder you work the luckier you will become.  Stop waiting around for things to work out.  If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting.
While many of us decide at some point during the course of our lives that we want to answer our calling, only an astute few of us actually work on it.  By “working on it,” I mean truly devoting oneself to the end result.  The rest of us never act on our decision.  Or, at best, we pretend to act on it by putting forth an uninspired, half-assed effort.
Remember, life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something worthwhile.  Achieving your dreams can be a lot of work.  Be ready for it.

Step #5 – Don’t make life harder than it needs to be.

Life is challenging enough without you senselessly complicating the simple.
As Oscar Wilde once said, “Life is not complex.  We are complex.  Life is simple, and the simple thing is the right thing.”
Read our article 60 Ways To Make Life Simple Again for good a reminder.

Step #6 – Exploit the resources you do have access to.

It’s not about having the right resources; it’s about exploiting the resources you do have access to.
Stevie Wonder couldn’t see, so he exploited his sense of hearing into a passion for music, and he now has 25 Grammy Awards to prove it.
Get it?

Step #7 – Focus on things you can change.

Some forces are out of your control.  The best thing you can do is do the best with what’s in front of you with the resources you do have access to.
Wasting your time, talent and emotional energy on things that are beyond your control is a recipe for frustration, misery and stagnation.  Invest your energy in the things you can change.

Step #8 – Don’t avoid things you don’t understand.

Right now there’s a lot you don’t know.  No matter how smart you are or how much you learn there will always be more to learn.  Hiding from what you don’t know will bury you right beside your dreams.
So embrace the things you don’t understand and study them.   Achieving this understanding is what living your life is all about.

Step #9 – Ignore negative naysayers.

When you receive negative feedback, remember, it doesn’t matter how many people don’t get it, it matters how many do.
Still, no matter how much progress you make there will always be the people who insist that whatever you’re trying to do is impossible.  Or they may incessantly suggest that the idea or dream as a whole is utterly ridiculous because nobody really cares.
When you come across these people, don’t try to reason with them.  Instead, forget that they exist.  They will only waste your time and energy.

Step #10 – Take good care of your body and your brain.

Your body is the greatest tool you’ll ever own.  It impacts every step you take and every move you make.  You won’t get anything done without it.
And don’t forget that your brain is part of your body too.  The human brain only accounts for roughly 2% of the total mass of the human body, yet it consumes over 20% of the oxygen and nutrients the human body intakes.
So nourish your body, exercise it and rest it appropriately. 

Step #11 – Work on your dreams when you first awake.

The mornings are a fresh start, peaceful and free of random mid-day distractions.  If you get the things done that are the most important to you first thing in the morning, it puts you in a better place, emotionally and creatively, for the remainder of the day.
So put your dreams first.  Even if you only have time to work on them for 30 minutes each morning, do it.  It truly makes all the difference in the world.  Each day, no matter what else happens, you will have done something to make your dreams come true.

Step #12 – Enjoy the pain of your greatest challenge.

Lots of people have achieved their dreams or conquered formerly impossible feats and continue to enjoy the possibilities of new challenges.  These people will all tell you there’s nothing more gratifying than the thrill of your greatest challenge – making your dreams a reality.  The inherent bruises and pains along the way are simply mile markers on your trip to the finish line.
And when you finally do finish, you may actually find yourself missing the daily grind.  Ultimately, you’ll realize that pleasure and pain can be one and the same.

Final Thoughts

As I’ve said before, if there was ever a moment to follow your heart and do something that matters to you, that moment is now.  Nothing ever gets done by reading an article about doing it.  You’ve got to put in the effort and take action.
So go for it!  Now!  Make yourself proud.

Hack Knowledge: Astrological Chocolate Guide to Love

Hack Knowledge: Astrological Chocolate Guide to Love

Astrological Chocolate Guide to Love

                   



       Astrological Chocolate Guide to Love




Wrapped in a heart-shaped box with a big bow --
or piece by piece savoring every magnificent morsel?
Here's the Astrological insight into the way each Sun Sign craves and consumes chocolate.




Aries
         ☺ Aries eats all of the chocolates in one sitting.☺

Taurus
☺Taurus tends to buy two boxes and leave only the orange ones for you.☺

Gemini ☺Gemini makes their chocolate choice by sticking their finger in each piece.☺

Cancer
☺Cancer draws it out to make even the smallest box last for a month.☺

Leo
☺Leo likes to own all the chocolates first.☺

Virgo

☺Virgo cuts their chocolates up into small, manageable bites with a knife and fork.☺

Libra
☺Libra chooses two boxes of chocolates, white and dark; one for you, one for them.☺

Scorpio
☺Scorpio can't resist rubbing them all over their partner and licking it off.☺

Sagittarius
☺Sagittarius only orders foreign chocolates.☺

Capricorn
☺Capricorn seeks perfection in picking truffles of the best variety.☺

Aquarius
☺Aquarius skips chocolates altogether -- they prefer a box of carob, with raisins.☺

Pisces
☺Pisces tends to share them all and forgets to leave one for their own consumption.
☺

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

60 Ways To Make Life Simple Again

                   

 

 

            60 Ways To Make Life Simple Again

When we were young life was easier, right? 
I know sometimes it seems that way.  But the truth is life still is easy.  It always will be. 
The only difference is we’re older, and the older we get, the more we complicate things for ourselves.
You see, when we were young we saw the world through simple, hopeful eyes. 
We knew what we wanted and we had no biases or concealed agendas. 
We liked people who smiled.  
We avoided people who frowned.  
We ate when we were hungry, drank when we were thirsty, and slept when we were tired.
As we grew older our minds became gradually disillusioned by negative external influences.
  At some point we began to hesitate and question our instincts.
  When a new obstacle or growing pain arose, we stumbled and a fell down. 
This happened several times.  Eventually we decided we didn’t want to fall again, but rather than solving the problem that caused us to fall, we avoided it all together.
As a result, we ate comfort food and drank alcohol to numb our wounds and fill our voids. 
We worked late nights on purpose to avoid unresolved conflicts at home.
  We started holding grudges, playing mind games, and subtly deceiving others and ourselves to get ahead.  And when it didn’t work out, we lived above our means, bought things we didn’t need, and ate and drank some more just to make ourselves feel better again.
Over the course of time, we made our lives more and more difficult, and we started losing touch with who we really are and what we really need.
So let’s get back to the basics, shall we?
  Let’s make things simple again.  It’s easy.
  Here are 60 ways to do just that:

Life is not complex.  We are complex.  Life is simple,
and the simple thing is the right thing.
- Oscar Wilde
  1. Don’t try to read other people’s minds.  Don’t make other people try to read yours.  Communicate.
  2.  Be polite, but don’t try to be friends with everyone around you.  Instead, spend time nurturing your relationships with the people who matter most to you.
  3. Your health is your life, keep up with it.  Get an annual physical check-up.
  4. Live below your means.  Don’t buy stuff you don’t need.  Always sleep on big purchases.  Create a budget and savings plan and stick to both of them.
  5. Get enough sleep every night.  An exhausted mind is rarely productive.
  6.  Get up 30 minutes earlier so you don’t have to rush around like a mad man.  That 30 minutes will help you avoid speeding tickets, tardiness, and other unnecessary headaches.
  7. Get off your high horse, talk it out, shake hands or hug, and move on.
  8. Don’t waste your time on jealously.  The only person you’re competing against is yourself.
  9. Surround yourself with people who fill your gaps.  Let them do the stuff they’re better at so you can do the stuff you’re better at.
  10. Organize your living space and working space.  Read David Allen’s book Getting Things Done for some practical organizational guidance.
  11. Get rid of stuff you don’t use.
  12. Ask someone if you aren’t sure.
  13. Spend a little time now learning a time-saving trick or shortcut that you can use over and over again in the future.
  14. Don’t try to please everyone.  Just do what you know is right.
  15. Don’t drink alcohol or consume recreational drugs when you’re mad or sad.  Take a jog instead.
  16. Be sure to pay your bills on time.
  17. Fill up your gas tank on the way home, not in the morning when you’re in a hurry.
  18. Use technology to automate tasks.
  19. Handle important two-minute tasks immediately.
  20. Relocate closer to your place of employment.
  21. Don’t steal.
  22. Always be honest with yourself and others.
  23. Say “I love you” to your loved ones as often as possible.
  24. Single-task.  Do one thing at a time and give it all you got.
  25. Finish one project before you start another.
  26. Be yourself.
  27. When traveling, pack light.  Don’t bring it unless you absolutely must.
  28. Clean up after yourself.  Don’t put it off until later.
  29. Learn to cook, and cook.
  30. Make a weekly (healthy) menu, and shop for only the items you need.
  31. Consider buying and cooking food in bulk.  If you make a large portion of something on Sunday, you can eat leftovers several times during the week without spending more time cooking.
  32. Stay out of other people’s drama.  And don’t needlessly create your own.
  33. Buy things with cash.
  34. Maintain your car, home, and other personal belongings you rely on.
  35. Smile often, even to complete strangers.
  36. If you hate doing it, stop it.
  37. Treat everyone with the same level of respect you would give to your grandfather and the same level of patience you would have with your baby brother.
  38. Apologize when you should.
  39. Write things down.
  40. Be curious.  Don’t be scared to learn something new.
  41. Explore new ideas and opportunities often.
  42. Don’t be shy.  Network with people.  Meet new people.
  43. Don’t worry too much about what other people think about you.
  44. Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven, and like minded.
  45. Don’t text and drive.  Don’t drink and drive.
  46. Drink water when you’re thirsty.
  47. Don’t eat when you’re bored.  Eat when you’re hungry.
  48. Exercise every day.  Simply take a long, relaxing walk or commit 30 minutes to an at-home exercise program.
  49. Let go of things you can’t change.  Concentrate on things you can.
  50. Find hard work you actually enjoy doing.
  51. Realize that the harder you work, the luckier you will become.
  52. Follow your heart.  Don’t waste your life fulfilling someone else’s dreams and desires.
  53. Set priorities for yourself and act accordingly.
  54. Take it slow and add up all your small victories.
  55. However good or bad a situation is now, it will change.  Accept this simple fact.
  56. Excel at what you do.  Otherwise you’ll just frustrate yourself.
  57. Mature, but don’t grow up too fast.
  58. Realize that you’re never quite as right as you think you are.
  59. Build something or do something that makes you proud.
 60. Make mistakes, learn from them, laugh about    them, and move along. 

Oh, and enjoy life’s simple pleasures.  They’re free and better than anything money can buy.  ;-)